Code Switching

Code switching gets reduced to “changing how you talk,” but in this episode of The Heavyweight Collective, the conversation goes much deeper than that. This is a real discussion about what happens when adapting becomes part of survival.

The episode explores how people shift their tone, behavior, appearance, and personality depending on where they are, who’s around, and what’s at stake. From workplaces to public spaces, the conversation breaks down the pressure to appear “safe,” “professional,” or “acceptable” in environments that can quickly judge or misunderstand you.

But the deeper conversation is emotional. Life doesn’t stop just because professionalism is expected. Grief, stress, pressure, and personal struggles don’t disappear when it’s time to perform confidence or composure. The discussion highlights how code switching can slowly become exhausting when it feels less like strategy and more like suppressing yourself to survive.

The episode also tackles authenticity, leadership masks, and the cultural side of performance, especially when Black culture is borrowed for entertainment, credibility, or profit without genuine understanding behind it.

 Thanks for tapping in with The Heavyweight Collective!
 Make sure you follow, subscribe, and share with someone who needs this convo. Catch us on all socials for clips, updates, and more behind the mic. https://linktr.ee/TheHeavyweightPodcast

Transcript

Frenemies Energy And Weekly Updates

SPEAKER_04 0:00

That's how change happens. You remove yourself from the in the things that make the things happen. Is that what you did? The shit still be there under the cover. You know, whatever. Under the cover? Under this is uh episode 243 of the Heavyweight Collective. I am Sharon and I'm here with my frenemies. Frenemies. You my friend. This nigga though. Uh who you guys are.

SPEAKER_00 0:24

I don't know who the fuck Sharon is. I thought that was Miss Don't Play in my fucking face. Frenemies.

SPEAKER_04 0:31

Oh, Kevin hurt. I'm sorry. Kevin is my dog. Okay.

SPEAKER_02 0:35

That's cool. The only frenemy is my mother spike strip when we leave.

SPEAKER_00 0:43

You ain't leaving. My bad. My guy. Don't I hope your phone? Kevin said, I hope your phone is on a call for a tow truck.

SPEAKER_04 0:52

Who are you?

SPEAKER_00 0:54

Which one of us?

SPEAKER_03 0:55

Yeah. Kevin. Uh I am uh Andy today. I'll just be Andy today. I like it.

SPEAKER_04 1:01

Kevin.

SPEAKER_03 1:02

She's looking at you.

SPEAKER_00 1:03

My mom my mama named me Maurice. Maurice.

SPEAKER_04 1:06

Call him Maurice.

SPEAKER_00 1:07

That's my mama named me.

SPEAKER_04 1:08

So yeah. How's your guys' week? How's everybody doing? What's going on? Can I start? Yeah, why didn't you just start?

SPEAKER_00 1:16

Just yeah, like you know you're hosting, right? I just feel like Kevin, how was your week? Hold on, let me tell you about mine first.

SPEAKER_04 1:23

My week was just layered. You know, I've been crying for three days. I got a baby that's graduating. I'm just so, so, so happy. I don't want to cry again today, but go ahead and cry. Please do get them numbers up. I probably no. You know what, you guys, when I start crying, it's like the floodgates are open. So very good possibility.

SPEAKER_00 1:43

She's she started crying, she's gonna start crying about shit from three years ago. She ain't processed.

SPEAKER_04 1:47

I mean, not that. I mean, a lot of my tears overcoming with I mean overcome with joy.

SPEAKER_02 1:53

White wine, but anyway, it's some white wine. Um that's been a tears.

SPEAKER_04 1:57

Yeah, so that was my week. I had a really good um leading up to I went to the Dodger Game last week.

SPEAKER_00 2:03

Oh, this one got money. Dodger game.

SPEAKER_04 2:05

You always have to go there. But no, this is something that's really funny. So I went to um, I'm gonna make it quick, I'm sorry. But I went back to the future is one of my like favorite movies. And um, there's this place in Riverside, the Farmhouse Collective, and they were supposed to, well, they did. I saw their little schedule they were gonna do Back to the Future on one of the nights, and I was like, oh, that'll be cool. So I was gonna Then I went on the wrong night, y'all. So we did end up watching the Dodgers game there too, but I was just so bummed because I really wanted to go watch Back to the Future, and I just felt like You know you didn't pay attention to the marquee. You I looked at the I even had a picture of it, y'all. When I tell you I was upset, I was upset, but yeah, there was that, and then but what were you upset at? I really wanted to watch that movie there. I love Back to the Future, and I just thought, you know, outdoors and it was just a little vibe.

SPEAKER_02 2:52

I'm just saying, did you get mad at you?

SPEAKER_04 2:54

Yeah, for sure.

SPEAKER_02 2:55

Okay, because that's the only person who fucked this up.

SPEAKER_04 2:57

Oh, yeah, a thousand percent. And it was funny too, because I invited my cousin up there. She hurried she was talking shit because she's like, girl, I don't want to go watch these white people movies. Like, she can't stand back to the future. And when we got there, she's like, and then the shit ain't even on. But it was fun, we had a good time.

SPEAKER_03 3:14

Good. Did you uh I'm upset like Drake?

SPEAKER_04 3:18

Crying for three albums. Well, I told you I was crying for three days, so basically, right?

SPEAKER_00 3:23

Shebang.

SPEAKER_04 3:23

Same shit. I hey the new okay, we'll we'll talk time.

SPEAKER_00 3:27

I mean, you can talk about it. I have no nothing to say. I have to do it. You didn't listen to it? No.

SPEAKER_04 3:30

I listened to the next one.

SPEAKER_00 3:31

I listened to the intro and the next song because McCly asked me to, and I've have not revisited that shit since.

SPEAKER_03 3:37

The intro was promising, and then I got disappointed. I didn't hate it. I didn't hate it.

SPEAKER_00 3:40

I didn't know. But it wasn't cohesive, I didn't think.

SPEAKER_02 3:42

But it was his therapy, though. It was his therapy, so it's we like, uh, you have to get this out.

SPEAKER_04 3:47

I feel like young Miami's little one song versus his whole three albums, Young Miami shit.

SPEAKER_03 3:56

Well, I say I'm the only one that thought Molly Santana was a guy until I realized it wasn't a guy.

SPEAKER_00 4:01

Wait, wait, wait. I'm sorry. I didn't know who the song was. On the Run to Atlanta song? Yeah. You thought Molly was a guy? I don't know who that is.

SPEAKER_03 4:06

On the song uh with Future and Drake, uh, it's a girl named Molly Santana from Fontana, actually. And uh I I I came across her TikTok after the song. Yeah. And I was like, wait a minute, that's a girl, it's not a guy?

SPEAKER_02 4:19

Does she go by that? She goes by her voice deep.

SPEAKER_03 4:21

Molly Santana. No, she should add the from Fontana. From Fontana.

SPEAKER_00 4:26

I like that. Is her voice deep? No.

SPEAKER_03 4:29

On the spot, I don't think it was that deep. I just thought it was a dude. Yeah.

SPEAKER_00 4:33

You know, I thought about that, because I saw Snippers about the Ron Tell Anna song, and I said, Drake and Future are two niggas that need counseling therapy.

SPEAKER_03 4:40

I just think that he was the catalyst for uh the smear campaign, and he's cool with him and said fuck everybody else.

SPEAKER_00 4:48

Yeah. Who? Drake Future.

SPEAKER_03 4:50

Future was yeah, he made the two albums.

SPEAKER_02 4:52

I have a feeling they don't think they've done some needs therapy, some nefarious stuff together.

SPEAKER_03 5:00

They ain't married. That's therapy.

SPEAKER_04 5:01

Yeah, you're right.

SPEAKER_03 5:02

It's like, oh, LeBron, you went to the pop-out show, fuck you. But Future, you made two albums saying fuck me, but we're cool. It's like, what the fuck?

SPEAKER_04 5:10

Y'all talking about I'm confused. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

SPEAKER_00 5:12

Don't just don't worry about it. My week was uh it was a fucking week. I'll just say that shit. It was I don't want to talk about it.

SPEAKER_04 5:17

Okay.

SPEAKER_00 5:18

I want the therapy. Yeah, that's the problem. And I enjoyed it.

SPEAKER_04 5:21

Hey man, you mad at therapy again, mom?

SPEAKER_00 5:23

Nah, you know, you know, you start realizing shit.

SPEAKER_04 5:26

That's the point. Yeah.

SPEAKER_00 5:28

Sometimes you don't realize shit.

SPEAKER_03 5:29

I realized I realized in my therapy session, I was like, she started talking and she and we get to like a conclusion, and I'm like, so you said it in the nicest possible way. Fuck them.

SPEAKER_00 5:41

Like everything I can't do a conclusion. Are you going there to hear exactly what I already tell you?

SPEAKER_03 5:45

Yeah, that's fucking me up. I'm like, so what you're saying in the nicest roundabout way.

SPEAKER_04 5:50

But you do know that therapy is highly based on what you think fuck. Well, I mean, like, you know what I'm saying? She could give you all of, or he or he, whatever. Um, yes. When you think about that realm of things, they could give you all this stuff. It's just like those pictures, like, oh, what is your interpretation of it? So everything that she told you may not have necessarily meant to convey fuck, but your receipt receipt of it.

SPEAKER_02 6:21

Like you feel this, you just don't want to.

SPEAKER_03 6:23

I can see see that, but listen, if I explain how she said it, you like, oh, that's just a really polite way of saying fuck them.

SPEAKER_01 6:33

Well, she know how to talk to you.

SPEAKER_03 6:34

Yeah, she just because I was like, oh, I'm trying to come to a conclusion. She was like, but why does it matter to you? And I'm like, you're right, you're right. And then she kept saying, like, and she gets to a conclusion. I'm like, so you're just telling me to say fuck what anybody else thinks, just do you. That's uh that's what I end up coming to.

SPEAKER_00 6:52

In so many words. Yeah, damn. I need to get my license. But that's my that's my answer to everything. I'm telling niggas after you're like, you know, Cheyenne Bryan out here killing you. Right. Right. Y'all stupid. I'm just supposed to call my little. I mean, she got away with it. I went to seven colleges that burned down and then like what you know, nigga walked in and robbed my they robbed my shit out of the office. Uh I was funny. I I don't know what the fuck we're talking about, Sean, but I'll my wife and I was talking about uh about Cheyenne, and I said, this is that's a that's proof that pretty privilege uh pretty privilege is a thing because no one ever questioned her. Yeah and I'm like, this at least we know Dr. Umar can give us a goddamn degree. Yeah, he has records. She has nothing.

SPEAKER_03 7:39

Well, the school had closed. Yeah, and then they only keep shit for two years.

SPEAKER_02 7:43

Somebody said, I ain't never heard nothing like that ever in my life. I could go to Grand Canyon University and get all my Fs.

SPEAKER_03 7:52

That's some wild shit.

SPEAKER_00 7:54

Somebody, somebody said that Dr. Cheyenne's school's burned and Umar never built his. Yeah, right. He said, I still trust Umar. That's Doctor.

SPEAKER_03 8:06

Yeah, that's some wild shit.

SPEAKER_04 8:08

I mean, that's social media to come be whoever you want to be.

SPEAKER_03 8:12

Well, I'm Dr. Uh Robinson. I like it.

SPEAKER_04 8:15

I'm ready to be. How was your week, Kevin?

SPEAKER_02 8:16

My week was heavy, good, but heavy. Good. Rest in peace, James. Rest in peace. Say that. That's right. I wanted to wait till we put him to rest before I said that here.

unknown 8:26

Yeah.

SPEAKER_02 8:26

We got to. So I had my I had my I had a good breakdown. I didn't think, I thought I had got through it, but you know.

SPEAKER_04 8:33

Can I say that? You love niggas crying? Yes. It's necessary. Especially in Greece.

SPEAKER_02 8:37

Well, I didn't fret. I was like, damn, I'm crying fret. All these niggas is.

SPEAKER_04 8:40

Yeah. But I mean, especially in Greece. He don't want to look up three years from now and find himself like fuck.

SPEAKER_00 8:44

I'm so fucked up. But I'm telling you right now, nigga, if McFly died for me, nigga, I'm crying in private.

SPEAKER_04 8:50

No, that's fine. I'm not saying it has to be crying to everybody.

SPEAKER_02 8:53

I mean, that's what I'm saying.

SPEAKER_04 8:55

Your release needs to happen.

SPEAKER_02 8:57

Well, no, the fight. I was crying. I spoke public crying more.

SPEAKER_03 9:00

I want public cries.

SPEAKER_04 9:02

Nigga, no, can I tell you you almost had me crying to the city?

SPEAKER_03 9:05

Put on my wish and I lost my shit.

SPEAKER_04 9:06

One of my really close friends died. Um, it's been four years since he met.

SPEAKER_00 9:11

I mean, you know a lot of people that died. I do. She's seen for me.

SPEAKER_04 9:15

So you in the middle.

SPEAKER_00 9:17

You in the middle, brother.

SPEAKER_04 9:20

Like, you're in the middle of here, nigga. No, um, that song is like a little song that always reminds me of like, you know, me and my friend, basically, that passed away. So I was like, fuck. Like, I felt I felt with it.

SPEAKER_00 9:34

You was already emotional too. Yeah, I couldn't know.

SPEAKER_04 9:38

What I was going to say, Kevin, which I think is necessary. Um, I love the fact that your day when I saw you and your wife posting your daughters.

SPEAKER_02 9:47

Yeah, that was a hell of a swing. I love that.

SPEAKER_04 9:49

Um, it was like the exact depiction of how our life is grief and joy all the time. Help, but to escape either, and it literally can happen on the exact same day. And you go from like this this horrible moment or grief or whatever, and then to this mountaintop, you know, Valley Low to Mountaintop, all within the same toilet.

SPEAKER_02 10:12

I gotta tell you though, and you're gonna laugh because I was recording because she it was for culinary arts, the award came up. She didn't know she was getting it, we didn't know. And then they got to talking, they're like, This student, and I was like, it couldn't be her. Oh then they were like, This student is a dual athlete. And I was like, That ain't her. I stopped recording, and then they called her name, and I was like, what the fuck?

SPEAKER_04 10:34

I stopped recording this comment, like, oh shit, that ain't her.

SPEAKER_02 10:39

They talking about the accumulation, okay, because she ain't playing nothing right now. So I was like thinking they meant now, but they're over her four years.

SPEAKER_04 10:45

Over the four years, I was like, I love that.

SPEAKER_02 10:47

Well, she never dueled them, but she did two sports.

SPEAKER_04 10:51

Hey, look, they're gonna sell some shit. They had to they had to give reason why they gave that kid that scholarship.

SPEAKER_02 10:55

Yeah, once I heard the scholarship, I said, Yeah.

SPEAKER_04 10:58

Oh, I love it.

SPEAKER_02 10:59

Way to go. You listen to something. Yeah.

SPEAKER_04 11:02

So all along with, I was about to try to be crafty. Um code

What Code Switching Really Means

SPEAKER_04 11:08

switching. Let's talk about code switching, guys.

SPEAKER_00 11:09

You're done. I how however do you mean?

SPEAKER_02 11:13

Do you mean in a positive or negative one? What are you talking about? Listen, what you mean, nigga?

SPEAKER_04 11:21

Code switching. So we often, and when I say we, I think people in general, but more importantly, but um more often us, as in black folks. Okay, you mean us to code switch?

SPEAKER_02 11:33

Niggas.

SPEAKER_04 11:34

Uh, yes, us niggas. We have to code switch. We have to code switch for very many reasons. Um, sometimes it's safety, sometimes you gotta switch the police. Um, it could be for job opportunities. Work is the obvious one. Everybody knows that you gotta do we have to. I don't think I'm just what we're gonna get into today. Let me start with that. Let me continue my intro.

SPEAKER_03 11:52

I've seen in many instances where Maurice has not co-switched their work, and I was like, damn, he still got a job.

SPEAKER_04 11:58

That's amazing. I love that because we're gonna get into that too. Um, and then sometimes you just have to coach switch for like quality service, like you might be at a steakhouse. You don't want to give all the niggas because you might feel like you know your food might not get pushed away.

SPEAKER_02 12:16

I'm gonna tell you right now, your shit's already fucked up when you walked into the fancy place as a nigga. That's just what they do.

SPEAKER_04 12:23

Good point.

SPEAKER_02 12:24

Just assume we'll stop.

SPEAKER_04 12:26

Also, with that being said, that's not my experience, but okay.

SPEAKER_00 12:31

That's not my experience, but okay.

SPEAKER_04 12:33

I love that you said that, Kevin, because code switching is not just the way that we talk, it's the way that we present ourselves, it's the way that we our mannerisms, our dress. So you may code switch, like you said, coming to the steakhouse. You may not come in the steakhouse with the nigga shit on. You might have you already knew that you had to come in with your code switch.

SPEAKER_01 12:53

I typically don't wear nigga shit, but yeah, sleep night shirt. Um I'll be walking around in Popeye shirt.

SPEAKER_04 12:57

I had code switch yesterday. I almost went, I had to go to my job, but I I had to pick something up, but I was off and I had a shirt on that said nigga on it, and I left the house just thinking I was going about my day, and I was like, I needed to go to work. And I was gonna turn the shirt inside out, and then I was like, you know what? I'm just but that was the shirt just only said nigga? No. Oh, okay. I thought you just said a shirt that just said nigga. I would love a shirt that just says nigga, actually, I'd wear it, but um, yeah, so code switching encompasses all of that. So let's start with um do you guys think and do not mock my question? We won't, Maurice.

SPEAKER_00 13:36

Damn.

SPEAKER_04 13:37

Do we have a choice?

SPEAKER_00 13:38

I mean, sometimes we really don't. Do we have a choice? Yeah, yeah, you always have a choice. Everything life is a choice. You're right. You chose to you chose to come here today. You're right. That's self-true.

SPEAKER_03 13:52

Everything's a choice, and there's also consequences to those choices. You just have to understand them. That's all right, that's all right, identify them and uh yeah, live with them and see what matters more.

SPEAKER_02 14:03

Yeah, yeah, you have nothing but a choice. I mean, if you go out with this impulse, we've seen all that.

SPEAKER_03 14:10

Yeah, yeah.

SPEAKER_04 14:12

Right, very true.

SPEAKER_03 14:14

That's a choice as well. Like when you gotta sometimes you gotta pick the battle to know because the the war is bigger than that. So sometimes you just look at it and be like, do I really want to win this battle if I if I see the bigger picture or something else?

SPEAKER_00 14:26

That's exactly how I approach my marriage. Oh, that's good. That's a good way.

SPEAKER_04 14:29

You can co-twitch within your own marriage.

SPEAKER_00 14:30

I'll be like, this shit ain't that important to me, whatever you want to do. But if it's something's really important, nigga, we fight.

SPEAKER_04 14:37

And I do want to say sometimes before we really get into the fibers of this, let's really put on the hat of thinking of co-twitching in everything.

SPEAKER_00 14:46

Okay. Okay.

SPEAKER_04 14:48

Not just saying, because like I just mentioned, like, it could be your mannerisms, it could be your clothing, okay, your attire, whatever. Let's not just think in how we shift up the way we're and I'm only saying that for your.

SPEAKER_00 14:58

Every time she moves her hand, I get I get bitchy. Okay.

unknown 15:01

I'm ready.

SPEAKER_00 15:02

Understood.

SPEAKER_04 15:04

Anyways, okay, so when do you guys think that um, in my opinion, code switching can sometimes go from especially and could go from code switching to actually fake and like performative, and you know what I mean? So what do you think? When you change your name to Braxton Braxton Party Partner Bridge, oh not Braxton. Oh why do we know that? I love that we all have the same job. Nigga, we know.

SPEAKER_03 15:34

I mean, they might not.

SPEAKER_04 15:35

Oh, if you're watching this, you should know. Damn it.

SPEAKER_00 15:38

Oh. You want to go that way too. I you know, I feel like, you know.

SPEAKER_03 15:46

That took me so long to realize he wasn't that oh yeah, he's Puerto Rican, right?

SPEAKER_00 15:49

Or Dominican? Who? Carlton? Alfonso? Yeah, Alfonso.

SPEAKER_04 15:53

Yeah, Cardi B can be black. Yeah, yeah. Uh Carlton is black.

SPEAKER_00 15:56

Yeah, Nick, he's black. He just got his ancestors got off on a uh different island. Basically.

SPEAKER_04 16:01

No, they got raped by the by different people.

SPEAKER_02 16:04

Damn, it just took a dark time.

SPEAKER_00 16:06

Yeah, it is. I'm sorry. Like uh, like like that, like that uh Mike Epps uh like that, like that nigga ain't like that.

SPEAKER_05 16:21

Like he ain't really like that.

SPEAKER_00 16:24

You know what I'm saying? Like you you'll see him in in one setting and you're like, nigga, who who the fuck is this? But then you see it by yourself and it's like he you a completely different person. Like, why are you being fake over there? Like, yeah, but some people some people do that shit because they feel like that's the only way they can protect what they have. Like they feel like they have to do that shit.

SPEAKER_02 16:40

So I mean it it's hard though. I don't know though, because sometimes I feel like my code switching is still all me.

SPEAKER_04 16:48

Dead ass.

SPEAKER_02 16:49

Like it's still all me, it's just different, different versions of me. We're like, nigga, why you talking to them like that? Like, well, I don't talk to y'all niggas like this, but I don't talk to this nigga.

SPEAKER_04 16:58

I love that, Kevin, because I I genuinely, and that was one of like one of my talking points I wanted to bring up. There's there's code switch nowity shifts. Everybody doesn't get the same level of personality, not everybody's gonna get percent charron.

SPEAKER_00 17:11

Well, what level I got? Can I be can I can I be reduced a couple levels? Switch codes, god damn, right?

SPEAKER_02 17:23

Because backspace up, you know, down from X, Y, B.

SPEAKER_00 17:31

Yeah, because I'm the nigga. That's probably less violent.

SPEAKER_04 17:33

It probably is.

SPEAKER_00 17:34

I probably wouldn't be doing all that. Yeah, yeah. That was that was real close to my face.

SPEAKER_04 17:38

That's funny, actually. Anyways, yes, I agree with you, Kevin.

SPEAKER_00 17:42

Because Kevin, I feel like I feel like I'm the same nigga no matter where I'm at. I feel like I just I may say uh more more less or more proper words in certain situations, but even when I say the proper words, you can you can you hear the nigga. No, that's the real shit. You hear my tone and my with what I what I mean, you know. So I I don't I guess I guess I I can see what you're saying.

SPEAKER_02 18:05

But at the same time, I'm like, no, nigga, I'm just gonna told you when in the Navy, this nigga from Philly, he told me that, and I was just like, what, what? It's like, yeah, I didn't know. I wasn't sure about you. And I was like, all right, well, this feels like we're we're having a heart to heart here. Yeah. It's like you, I seen you with like white people and you like, you like fit in. And then I seen you with this niggas and you fit in. So I'm like, oh, you just okay, so that's just you. Like, yeah.

SPEAKER_00 18:35

Yes. Yeah. But I I think in that, I think the nigga was just looking too much into it. You know, I think I feel like sometimes people are looking at people like that to see like what side you on. And a lot of times, like, nigga, I don't have the side I'm on is my side. Exactly. That's that's why you can't really put me in a group because I'm on my side. So I'm not switching, I'm just being me. That was the last day I hung out with them niggas. Nigga, I I picked the side.

SPEAKER_04 19:07

No, for real.

SPEAKER_03 19:09

Um, I'll say, it makes me think about the Chappelle uh joke where he was saying, like, when you talk to somebody fake and it makes you fake familiar. I did that shit one time in eighth grade and it did, I didn't like how it made me feel. Yeah. So I was like, oh my god, I was like, oh hi. And I was like, what the fuck? Um it made me just realize I don't like that shit. I was even talking to my therapist about that shit. I said, I don't I can't have small talk with people. That's why shit tends up to be awkward, because I can't have I can't force fake things, so I just tend to get real quiet. Yeah, and then like Maurice will say, is like, nigga, you ain't an introvert, you just very selective who you talk to. Like I just asked But I guess that because he's he's seen in instances where I've had conflict with with management and I didn't say much. I think my um energy and my facial expression said everything I needed to say, but I didn't coach, which I just kind of understood. I'm gonna dial back on how I approach this, but I'm gonna let it know, let you know that I don't fuck with you. So fuck you, fuck you, Devin. I said it.

SPEAKER_00 20:16

Oh I mean, it's clear you get your voting card when you're like, okay. Yeah, like so I'll be like, that nigga said everything he needed to say with that okay.

SPEAKER_03 20:25

So it's I it I don't I for cold switching it, I think it looks like Kevin says it's this it's just different versions of you, but I just understand, and you just gotta know who how

Authenticity Versus Performance At Work

SPEAKER_03 20:35

to approach the situation, not necessarily switch up who you are, but know how to approach a situation so it doesn't put you at a disadvantage. It doesn't put you in some weird fucked up position to where now you're trying to figure out how you're in an unemployment line or some shit. Like you just want to know, all right, I know you have this position of power, so I know I can't say these words to you, so you can try to use it against me. But I'm still gonna be me in that discourse. But I just gotta know what not to say in that situation.

SPEAKER_00 21:02

See, my brain takes it differently. I know you have this level of power, so I can't say it to you directly. Yeah, but I'm gonna I'm gonna I'm gonna let it I'm gonna let it feel like I said that for real.

SPEAKER_04 21:14

And I think that that's like I feel like when I think of the ultimate like performative version of it, like just some fake ass shit. Is have you guys ever seen the movie Fighting Temptation? Yeah, yeah, so Cubican Jr. He had a whole fake ass life, right?

SPEAKER_00 21:29

He will until he got that degree down south vagina. Why is it always some cast as that character? Because that's what he's that's what he's doing for.

SPEAKER_04 21:38

But I had a coworker like that, she's a black girl, and I just so much of her, I felt like, girl, are is this real? Like, you know what I'm saying? And I work in a very professional and I have been in it for a very long time. And I know that code switching is necessary, but I have somebody tell me something a very long time that you have to adapt. But you never lose self. And I a hundred percent like to this day, I kept that. I I walk in that. Like, and be because, and now, mind you, this comes from probably the first six or seven years at my job, I didn't even want to wear braids because just the feel of things. Like, you know what I mean? I were in there, and you know, not to I'm not being disrespectful, I'm just saying it as a matter of fact. I worked in a criminal courtroom, you know what I'm saying? Like the people coming in there are for criminal cases. And I didn't, I know that I already was in a position where I'm the black girl and they're gonna place me in the same bracket as these people that are coming in that are criminals, and I don't want to give you more by also having the same hair as them. Like, you know what I mean? So I wouldn't wear braids, and then finally I was like, fuck that. Yeah, you like them. Exactly. I was 100%. Like I said, I was I was in my early 20s. And I also had because I feel like four of us, we're a hundred percent with that adapt and mold and and become what the white people want you to be. You know what I mean? So that was kind of what was being told to me. And then I started wearing braids, and then I was like, yeah, no, hell no. And that was when I really kind of evolved into like, yes, I'm probably gonna have different choice of words, but I'm a hundred percent still me. And then it grew into now I'm the black girl, but I'm very respected. Like, you know what I mean? So I think that it's necessary, very, very code switch and adapt when you need to, but you have to remain true to what you are.

SPEAKER_02 23:31

Yeah, I'm my code. No, I'm just saying the thing about the code switching, the phony code switching is you Are you talking about the Malibu? I don't know. The Malibute? I'm still because you I'm not be ready. Only reason I say this is because it can go for a while. I don't know. I don't want to say forever, but like it's it's lying. It's like lying. Yeah, you know what I'm saying? And you always have to keep up the lie. At some point, motherfuckers always fumble somewhere. Yeah, that's true. Like it's somewhere where you're like, you know what I think it is though?

SPEAKER_04 24:00

They fumble with somewhere, but with someone. A lot of people don't read people the same way. Yeah, some people will be fooled, like I know people that will be fooled for forever just because they don't read it the same way. Now, you or I, because we're having this conversation, I can say that I think that you'd probably read it.

SPEAKER_02 24:18

And oh, I'd pick it up quick. There's a dude I work with who be just like, and it's funny because everyone knows he's full of shit. And when it's somebody who's a position of power that can like fire him or whatever, he he is way different. And like then you talk to those people and they're like, listen, I understand that he's just full of shit. Like he talks shit about me, but when I talk to him, oh hey, sir.

SPEAKER_04 24:47

You're like, so everyone knows. It's disgusting. I'm sorry, I work for the city.

SPEAKER_00 24:51

And the people at my job know, uh, I'm gonna say the shit to your face. So you ain't gotta worry about what I'm gonna say behind your back.

SPEAKER_03 25:00

I can I can I can attach that.

SPEAKER_00 25:02

No, I get you. If I don't like you, nigga, you gonna know I don't like you. So to in order, my cold switching at job when I don't at my job when I don't like you is nigga, I just don't talk to you. No, I feel you. Because if I spoke to you, you're not gonna like how I say it because nothing's gonna be pleasant.

SPEAKER_04 25:15

And that's cold switching.

SPEAKER_00 25:16

Not even the yes to the no ain't gonna be pleasant. It's gonna be the fuck no.

SPEAKER_04 25:20

You know, I'm like, that's you knowing yourself though. You know what I mean? So it's like I so I'm adapting.

SPEAKER_00 25:26

So I feel like what picked back off what you were saying, I feel like you don't have to co-switch when you just assure yourself I'm assure of myself.

SPEAKER_04 25:32

Yeah, but I also think that, like I said, that's in the lane of adapting. You know to adapt to this person by just I'm not gonna think of this. What you want, you know what I'm saying? Like, it's still being authentic, authentic, though. And that's where the line gets drawn.

SPEAKER_02 25:45

Well, I'll tell you, I'm fake as fuck. Like, fuck it. I'll be fake as fuck. Like, I'll be at work with motherfuckers I just don't like. And I'm like, I don't like hey, what's up? I need you to do this. Oh, yeah, I take it. All right, bro. Don't matter. Like, I'm like, once I clock out, I'm not calling you. Like, we're not always this is just work. Yeah. Cause I need you. We gotta work together to work.

SPEAKER_04 26:08

I found myself faker in leadership positions. Like when I was in, and I had to, like, I'm training you. I have to be. You know what I'm saying? That made me that made me faker. I'm not, I'm not telling me the truth.

SPEAKER_02 26:21

I'm training. I'm like, these motherfuckers told you this. That shit ain't real.

SPEAKER_04 26:25

Well, no, obviously that. But I mean, just like, I'm not going, like, let's say I don't like you, right? Oh, well, you can't.

SPEAKER_00 26:31

And I can just Okay, yeah.

SPEAKER_04 26:34

Let's say I don't like it.

SPEAKER_00 26:36

We know it to be true.

SPEAKER_04 26:37

I can't just the what same way my peers, somebody that I work side by side with, the same way that I could just shut the fuck up and not deal with you. I can't do that if I'm training you. You know what I'm saying? Yeah, so I do find myself, it's not to the extreme, but I have to be a little bit thinker with the motherfuckers that I'm that in leadership. I have had to do that.

SPEAKER_03 26:55

Yeah, because you need the best performance out of that person.

SPEAKER_02 26:57

I ain't gonna ask about your kids though. Exactly.

SPEAKER_04 26:59

Period. No, really. So that's where the personality privilege gets pulled back a little bit. You're not getting everything, but you're getting, you know.

SPEAKER_00 27:06

It's funny because the therapist asked me about coworkers, and she's like, Don't isn't some of your co-worker's friends? I said, I only consider you a friend if you've been in my house. Period. Yeah, if I if I if I invited you to my house, if I if I ain't seen the inside of your bathroom, you're not,

Learned Behavior Or Human Survival Skill

SPEAKER_00 27:20

or you haven't seen the inside of my bathroom, you're not really a friend, nigga. That's how I look at it. You know, that's true.

SPEAKER_04 27:25

So so tell me what y'all think. Do y'all think that code switching is a learned behavior, or is it something that you just kind of like naturally?

SPEAKER_00 27:32

I think it's something that everybody does.

SPEAKER_04 27:34

Uh-huh.

SPEAKER_00 27:34

Not just black people. I think it's across the board. Oh, we're gonna get there. We're gonna get there. I think that should go across the board.

SPEAKER_04 27:39

But my question is, did we learn it? Did somebody teach it to us? Or did it it happens?

SPEAKER_00 27:45

I think it's in, I think it's innate. I think I think it's a part of survival and and and being adaptable. Yeah. The situation. And I feel like some people just take that shit too far.

SPEAKER_05 27:53

Yeah.

SPEAKER_03 27:54

I feel like it's like it's both. Um because there are times where I was growing up that my dad kind of just put me on game as I was getting older, and then when you you see you're like, oh shit, this is what he was talking about. So then you start. It's kind of like experience slash somebody giving you some sort of uh it's out there, and you're like, oh word, and then you see, you're like, oh, this is what the fuck you was talking about. This is the shit I'm gonna have to deal with. Okay. All right, yeah. How do you talk to the police?

SPEAKER_04 28:21

How you do that, like I think we start cold switching as as chill. You know when you go around, you know when to like you start cold switching. I think that it it is instilled in you without not intentionally, but you know when to straighten up.

SPEAKER_00 28:37

You know, you go and start your parents and yeah, yeah, I was gonna say what Kevin said. You start cold switching at at birth. Yeah. Because you know, like one parent, you can get away with more than the other. So you like, you know, I can I could be a little more, I could be a little more this way with mom, or I gotta be this way with dad to try. It's uh I feel like it's that's what I'm saying. I feel like I don't feel like it's a learned behavior. I this thing is something everyone does.

SPEAKER_02 28:54

You just yeah, it's just part of being human. And sometimes it depends on like who's around. Like some because you talk about like talking to police and stuff. Depending on what scenario I'm in, is how I know you you've been honest. So it's but there's times where it's like, say I'm with the kids, I'm like, I I I'll scale way back. I'll be way different when I'm with them. Yeah, like the last time I got pulled over, I was hot and I was just like, I want to say a lot of shit, but I'm like, I'm gonna just go ahead and just what do they call? Decorum. Have a little decorum right now.

SPEAKER_03 29:27

I know the times I'll be putting like the people in the car that weren't black thought it was funny, but I I just said I don't know what this Friday night, yeah, yeah. I don't know what this nigga's on. I put my hands on the fucking dash, went like this and was like, he's like, what you doing? I said, nigga, I don't know what is how it's gonna turn out. They just like Andy, just calm down. It's not even said this is different for y'all. This is different.

SPEAKER_04 29:47

Yeah, well, yeah, that's like how we opened up. It's sometimes it's for safety and it's it's embedded in us. We know, I mean, we know, act right, like you know what I'm saying? Even if you ain't did shit, all of that. You you you hold yourself in a certain way, and it don't even have to be respectful because to be honest, sometimes it'd be like, fuck you, but I'm gonna sit here and put my hands on the desk. Yeah, like more like you know what I mean.

SPEAKER_03 30:12

You understand, like, oh yeah, this will go anywhere. Yeah, trust me.

SPEAKER_04 30:16

Um, have you ever had a job where it was not necessary to code switch?

SPEAKER_00 30:20

Yeah, I got one now.

SPEAKER_03 30:22

It's not he's not wrong, but uh it it, I mean, I I said I do think observing you, I do think you keep your authentic self, but I think you do know when to approach the situation differently.

SPEAKER_00 30:35

I don't go off the rails.

SPEAKER_03 30:36

But I guess that's to that one supervisor you called a bitch. I was like, whoa.

SPEAKER_00 30:40

Do his face.

SPEAKER_03 30:41

Well, that's uh Oh, and it was a man?

SPEAKER_04 30:42

Yeah, I love that for now. I love that. Because that nigga was probably really acting like a bitch. If a two you gotta call a man a bitch, sir, you are being a bitch because that's out of line.

SPEAKER_03 30:57

But the um in the situation I had with a supervisor, I know it wasn't cold switching out instead of just understanding the situation. He had uh put his hand in my face, and I said, and we're in a and by ourselves in the and the he's a supervisor, he usually gets away with talking to people crazy. It triggered when you said something, Kevin. But the motherfucker put his hand on my sister. I said, First off, we're not doing that. And he just was like, I said, look, I said, my dad don't even put his hand on my face. And I just said, look, like we're gonna respect each other. This is the that, but it's just kind of like you the tone said everything. I didn't have to say much. And after that, he gave me as many gifts and things, and he acts like we're best of friends every time I see him. But it took me him catching him by himself and letting it be known, like, hey, I understand you're in a position of whatever, but we're not doing that. And it's just keep it simple, but make your point.

SPEAKER_00 31:55

But you know who people are. But you can you you know who people are when they by themselves.

SPEAKER_03 31:58

Yeah.

SPEAKER_00 31:59

When they when they feel like they, when it when that safety net not directed behind them, because like in in the office, you know, he's he he feels he feels protected. You got other people, you got cameras. When I said that shit to yourself, uh to you to your face on the street, nigga, when it's just me and you in the street light, you had a whole different tone.

SPEAKER_05 32:16

Yeah. You had a whole different tone.

SPEAKER_00 32:19

Because I said, I would, I said, because I think I called him a bitch. I said, I'll get fired, and I'll be back in three weeks.

SPEAKER_02 32:24

Fuck. I was provoked. I don't think I I let too much. I I don't know. I gotten really good at knowing how to just get shit out without being disrespectful. I wasn't. It's like when it's really, it's really, it's it's it's fun, it's nice.

SPEAKER_05 32:40

It is.

SPEAKER_02 32:41

I was when people say stuff and you just be, hey, you know that's dumb, right? Like we shouldn't play like anything. It's just I wasn't, I wasn't, I wasn't healed back then, Kevin. You know, I wasn't one of those. I would do it now.

SPEAKER_04 32:54

It depends on what it is.

SPEAKER_02 32:55

If you gotta I think it brings you gotta respond a certain way.

SPEAKER_04 32:58

Uh is it etiquette or is it survival? You know what I mean? Like, I think that what you're saying.

SPEAKER_00 33:03

No, it was no my situation was directly you're not gonna play in my fucking face.

SPEAKER_04 33:06

Yeah.

SPEAKER_00 33:07

It took the premonition. It took the premonition, huh?

SPEAKER_04 33:13

I feel like what you're oh my, what I think about what you're saying, Kevin, is like that's sometimes etiquette. Like, you know what I mean? It's like I have this way of saying this to you, and I have this way. I'm going to choose this way because it's probably gonna be, it's probably gonna prove to be a better outcome.

SPEAKER_02 33:34

Yeah, I'm saying the same thing, though. I'm saying the same thing.

SPEAKER_04 33:36

Yeah, uh, that's not necessarily the survival that we talked about with police.

SPEAKER_00 33:42

I feel like I only do that, I feel like I only do that with women.

SPEAKER_04 33:44

Have etiquette.

SPEAKER_00 33:45

That's only only only that's out of respect. But if if if she gets disrespectful, I'm gonna start talking to you like you. If you want to, if you're gonna act like a man, I'm gonna talk to you like you're a goddamn man.

SPEAKER_04 33:54

I ain't not about that.

SPEAKER_00 33:54

I mean, but for the most part, I'm like, I like you know, like the female supervisors, I talk to them way different. I got there's a different tone, different energy, and less

Safety, Policing, And Power At Work

SPEAKER_00 34:05

they wanna but they start you know squaring their shoulders, nigga, hey, this is what you want, nigga. Yeah.

SPEAKER_04 34:10

Do you do you code switch within your own race?

SPEAKER_00 34:12

No, I just tell them nigga, shut the fuck up, nigga. I'm sure, yeah. Absolutely. Cold switch or just understand different vanilla.

SPEAKER_04 34:19

I gave the framework of it. Wait, hold on.

SPEAKER_00 34:22

I think I do. Absolutely. In my own race, uh huh. Because when I get around old black men, I talk old black men.

SPEAKER_04 34:27

Okay.

SPEAKER_00 34:27

But that's my favorite passport.

SPEAKER_04 34:28

Yeah.

SPEAKER_00 34:29

Just like absolutely. That's what I mean.

SPEAKER_04 34:31

It's like think of it on a larger spectrum. I'll start calling people. Yeah, depends on the stuff.

SPEAKER_03 34:35

I start calling people suckers. Yeah, the demographic I mean, if I'm talking to older people, is the more respectful. And then um with niggas my age or younger, it might you might hear more niggas flipping.

SPEAKER_02 34:45

Right, but they're different types of niggas, too. Yeah, there's some adaptable. There's some motherfuckers you'll be around and they're like, well, I don't do all the things. Like we can still talk, but like uh I don't want this to be uncomfortable. Like, because that's why I think a lot of code switching in is more of a comfortability for yourself. Yeah. Well, you're like, I don't want this to just be like, yeah.

SPEAKER_04 35:09

What did you say?

SPEAKER_00 35:09

Like let me let me ask y'all this, uh Kevin and Andy. I find myself now that I I prefer the older man as young men and younger man as younger. I talk, yeah. I say I don't want to disrespect the older. I'm like, how you how old are you? How young are you, man? Are you trying to you know? You know, how you're like you know, young sleep, I'm 70.

SPEAKER_04 35:31

You're sweet. Oh, you're nice. I love that. Well, I'm a lot of brothers. I feel like I grew up around a lot of old black people, so I that's like where my heart is.

SPEAKER_00 35:41

Old black people are my favorite.

SPEAKER_04 35:42

They are my favorite people in the world, literally. Like, I love me, and especially old black people, especially when you find an old racist black person.

SPEAKER_00 35:49

That shit is hilarious.

SPEAKER_04 35:50

Oh, yeah. They extend white people for shit.

SPEAKER_02 35:54

I don't think I don't think I would be that much.

SPEAKER_00 35:56

Oh, yeah, I forgot about it.

SPEAKER_02 35:59

So you don't you don't like my you don't like my kids?

SPEAKER_00 36:04

No, they don't know. But no, they they they just gonna tell you you can't cut it to me more times.

SPEAKER_04 36:08

No, oh, oh, old black men like have my heart for forever. Like, literally have my heart. But I do I definitely because that that's what I was saying earlier about bringing your upbringing. Like, I always knew to act right in front of my grandma's friends, and like you know, so I still have to be able to do that. You know, I mean it was just respect. I really like respect was really instilled. Like, you know what I'm saying?

SPEAKER_02 36:31

Like it was instilled.

SPEAKER_04 36:33

Yes.

SPEAKER_03 36:34

Just well, I went up, got the pookie plate and um, and I was in that room, my guy was like, I knew I was I could adapt to the situation because I'm like, these niggas is on some some other shit, yeah. Yeah, it was like I felt like a drug transaction for some fucking macaroni and chicken, nigga. But I understood in that situation how to adapt to just be like, I'm cool. Like they was like, he cool. But then I was like, I'm not supposed to be here. And I felt that. And I was like, you ever get that? Like you're like, nigga, I make too much money to be in this situation.

SPEAKER_02 37:03

I'll tell you. I just now do not don't go.

SPEAKER_04 37:07

Just do not have you ever been in a situation where you felt like code switching was weaponized against you? And I can give an example of that. Give an example, please don't feel like that. I feel like um the whites often will try to appeal to us by code switching into their, oh, I I used to listen to sugar free and you know, that type of shit.

SPEAKER_02 37:31

Like if it's for real, I'm cool, but if it's fake, I'm not.

SPEAKER_04 37:34

Yeah, I mean, it could be. I always feel like um you can sense it. It bothers me. Yeah, you can sense it. It bothers me, even down to like you get like the little social media little clips of you know, there's different people uh on there where they're always singing songs from the early 2000s and shit, right? Yeah, and it's this white girl and she's just knowing all the words, and it's just everybody's like, oh that girl, and it's like you know, she could have looked at the lyrics right before this shit came along. Because she just knew who was gonna be her audience, and I think they hate it. Like, I genuinely feel like it's a I guess it's not for negative, well, it's it's for views and shit like that when when talking about the example that I gave, but I don't like it when it's to appeal to us basically and I think that that's where it turns into managers. I mean, not manifesting it. That's gonna turn into being weaponized and politicians and like on so many scales of things.

SPEAKER_00 38:26

I agree uh to the point where I'm not a fan of non-black people using black culture to get views and money.

SPEAKER_04 38:32

Well, I'm not a fan of that gain, any type of gain.

SPEAKER_03 38:35

That's why I fuck with the the whites that that uh just authentically them. I don't fuck with that. At least you being you, like you're not trying to uh appease something like that. Should be pissed me off. I've had black people in my house, nigga, don't tell me that.

SPEAKER_04 38:49

Yeah, am I the fourth one of those? I mean, and I get I think that when it's authentic, it shines through. Like my best friend I've known since kindergarten is Mexican, fully Hispanic.

SPEAKER_00 39:00

Like, and when we we're growing up, you better make sure they're Mexican because they don't like it when you mix up.

SPEAKER_04 39:05

No, she's Mexican for sure. It's one of my best friends in seventh grade, like she's Mexican, but she grew up, we grew up the same, you know what I'm saying? So a lot of cultural things, yeah, she's very aware of, but she she never comes off as you know, trying to like zone into that for appeal. Like, don't get me wrong, it was in seventh grade, she had the whole little Jenny from the block look going because that was popular at the time or whatever. But I that's one of the things that I respect about her because we are so much alike culturally because we grew up together literally, but she never like crosses the line of trying to appeal that way, like she knows she's Mexican.

SPEAKER_00 39:48

I think, like Kevin said, you can tell the ones that are genuine. Yeah, you can tell.

SPEAKER_02 39:52

Yeah, you can. Yeah, what's that dude in milk? I think I think that niggas really like that. You should look up milk and you'd be like, oh shit.

SPEAKER_04 40:04

And some people didn't like that. Milk, is it a movie?

SPEAKER_02 40:08

No, it's a white dude in who apparently was in the Hoovers and grew up over there, and you like they had a whole episode where they had people blindfolded and they were like, guess who like the black person is, or who's not black, and it was milk one, but he white. Yeah.

SPEAKER_04 40:27

Well, did you guys see that that trend that was going on? Like when I was a wigger. Did you guys see that?

SPEAKER_00 40:33

Yeah, I seen that shit.

SPEAKER_04 40:34

And they were doing, and all these white girls who are now fully found themselves as white women, yeah, were showing, or men, whatever, but um, they were showing their days of when they were in black culture and all. And it was well, if it felt like a mockery.

SPEAKER_02 40:49

Let me change the thing with milk though, too. He was adopted at birth by a black family. So it's like one of those words like he can't help it.

SPEAKER_05 40:57

His upbringing. That was his upbringing.

SPEAKER_02 40:59

Yeah.

SPEAKER_00 41:00

Uh I don't to your point. I don't, I don't think, I don't think, I think some of them, uh some of them, Sean,

When Culture Gets Used For Gain

SPEAKER_00 41:05

was definitely what you said, but I think some of them were different.

SPEAKER_04 41:07

Some, yeah.

SPEAKER_00 41:07

Yeah.

unknown 41:08

Yeah.

SPEAKER_04 41:08

In the midst of it, I think that the mockery comes from how they be displaying it now.

SPEAKER_00 41:12

I'll say that in my mind, I know that logic is black. I don't. I know his mama is black.

SPEAKER_04 41:19

He's a rapper.

SPEAKER_00 41:19

I can't.

SPEAKER_04 41:21

I mean his daddy is black.

SPEAKER_00 41:24

So in my mind, I I I know that. Is is I'm still not comfortable. See, I I'm not convinced.

SPEAKER_02 41:30

I get into the thing when we go into that, where it's like, when we I know we're joking, but when we talk like this, it's almost like we make black be better like a certain thing.

SPEAKER_04 41:40

I was about to say better.

SPEAKER_02 41:41

Like black is a whole spectrum. There's a lot of black people out there where you're like, they ain't black.

SPEAKER_04 41:46

I love that point, Kevin. Nigga, they black.

SPEAKER_00 41:48

I promise you they black black nigga Rachel was not black.

unknown 41:51

Who?

SPEAKER_04 41:51

Rachel?

SPEAKER_02 41:53

From uh Friends? She's white, yeah. Jennifer Henry. I know he's on.

SPEAKER_00 41:57

Hear me out.

SPEAKER_04 41:58

You know who comes to mind right now?

SPEAKER_00 42:00

From NAAC's P.

SPEAKER_02 42:02

Oh well, she was not. Yeah, she's for real white.

SPEAKER_04 42:05

Who comes to mind is y'all boy Marshall Mathers. That nigga, he is a no, no, no, no. That was what y'all received him as. Yeah, that is a white man. He never did nothing but appeal to be a white man. And I respect Eminem for that. No, no, no, no, no, no, no.

SPEAKER_00 42:19

No, no, no.

SPEAKER_04 42:20

He's a white dude.

SPEAKER_00 42:21

No, wait, wait.

SPEAKER_04 42:22

No, we have no one.

SPEAKER_00 42:24

But we we agree with you, Sharon, that he is a white dude, but he's still a he has been adopted. He was talking against his been talking against his will.

SPEAKER_03 42:33

Yeah.

SPEAKER_04 42:34

And now, okay, I love that you said against his will because I uh my point is that Eminem has never tried to appear. I agree. He's never tried to that's what I respect about him. Because him being a rapper and him clearly already being invited to the barbecue by y'all niggas, he could have definitely gone that lane in that lane and he didn't.

SPEAKER_02 42:52

I don't know. I'm not inviting that nigga to the barbecue. I'm not. I like him. I just feel like he's gonna break everything.

SPEAKER_03 42:58

How do you think he's like Marshall's madness? He's always angry.

SPEAKER_04 43:02

Kicked a hole in my fucking TV. Y'all are so dumb.

SPEAKER_03 43:04

That made me think about that. Uh, there was this white kid that used to hang out at University Village. He used to hang out with all the niggas. And uh, I remember uh I don't even know what happened to Calvin, but I remember me and Calvin were hanging out. He said, That nigga's a nigga. I said, What are you talking about? He's like, This nigga brought a cup. A solo cup? An empty cup, and said, Who got the drink?

SPEAKER_04 43:24

Was it Sean Jones?

SPEAKER_03 43:24

Oh, wow. I remember his name.

SPEAKER_04 43:27

What was his name? No, Sean Jones was my father.

SPEAKER_03 43:31

So if somebody had Sean at the time. He just had a cup and it was like, this nigga just brought a cup. I was like, who got the drink? He was like, what the fuck? Like, but he was dead genuine. You could tell this wasn't a some sort of like facade. Yeah, it was him. And we respected him for it.

SPEAKER_04 43:45

Like, I think it's interpretation. I think it's also it's interpretation, and it's also from the degree of how you know the person. Because some people, people like upbringing, you know what I'm saying? Some people will be like, oh no, she was. I'd be like, No, she wasn't. I knew who she went home. That shit was some shit she picked up when she was at school and she turned it the fuck off when they got home. And like, you know what I'm saying? So I get that because again, like I know we especially when you're talking about upbringing, like culture is culture. Like, you know what I'm saying? And like like what Kevin was saying, you gotta think. Black people, we have we are so multi-dimensional within our own culture.

SPEAKER_03 44:22

Yeah.

SPEAKER_04 44:22

But so if somebody adapts to a certain part of it because of their upbringing, I get that. But if the kids that was coming to school acting like they was gangbanging, and then you see them at the store with their parents, like, come on, bruh. Yeah, that's that's different.

SPEAKER_03 44:37

It's dope, and in our culture, we could even if we're it's not the same upbringer, we can identify things and go, oh yeah.

SPEAKER_04 44:43

Yeah, I love that. I love our culture. I just I do love being black.

SPEAKER_03 44:48

You recognize the instant, like, oh yeah, that's authentic. I I recognize that. I might have not dealt with that exactly, but I know exactly what that is.

SPEAKER_04 44:54

You know, so I'm kind of out of questions for y'all.

SPEAKER_02 44:56

But one thing that I do want to have to announce it, you could have just no, you know what? Oh, sure.

SPEAKER_01 45:03

You should have co-switched that one. You know what I mean? So we're gonna throw this out.

SPEAKER_04 45:09

No, and you know what? That brings up a good point, Kevin. Because when I went into this, like me and Mo are always arguing about how I feel like I don't host well. And when I went into this episode, I was trying to, because I love how you host, and I was trying to configure my method to uh like kind of be like yours, and I was like, no, let me just do what I'm gonna do. Yeah, be original, nigga. Yeah, so that's what I just did.

SPEAKER_00 45:33

So that's what you did wonderful.

SPEAKER_04 45:36

Thank you. I appreciate that.

SPEAKER_00 45:37

But what I do want to say, did this nigga clap for herself? No, no, she's punching her. I'm gonna clap for me, let you niggas know.

SPEAKER_04 45:48

I always clap for me, anyway. Um one thing I do want to point out because it didn't come up in conversation, but I have to say it. I think that code switching is necessary, but going back to the point that I said and adapting but not losing yourself is so important because we code switched for safety, we code switched to be accepted and all these things. But I think that if over time we remove the stigmas by not code switching, I don't, yeah.

SPEAKER_02 46:20

I'm gonna let you finish.

SPEAKER_04 46:21

And then when I say over time, I mean hundreds of you.

SPEAKER_02 46:22

I'm gonna let you finish.

SPEAKER_04 46:23

Go ahead. I would love to.

SPEAKER_03 46:27

Kevin, I swear at that moment, the way you're shaking your hair, you're about to say cereal, no milk. No merk. I hate Kevin. Because you were gonna you was shaking, I was like, why is he shaking his head?

SPEAKER_04 46:37

So all right because I hate because he because I hate anybody here.

SPEAKER_03 46:40

A mashia with a fork.

SPEAKER_04 46:42

Anyways, I think he's if we attempted again, going back to like I said, I started wearing braids to work. If we and then I ended up being respected in my position, the braids, nigga.

SPEAKER_00 46:54

Let's get to the important man. What? He said deodorant.

SPEAKER_04 46:59

I hate him. Anyways, if we do those things steadily and be consistent in that, then perhaps we can remove the stigmas that are there that makes people think that they have to.

SPEAKER_00 47:16

Doesn't steadily mean consistent? You didn't have to say both.

SPEAKER_02 47:20

So can I say this? I don't think it's necessary to co-switch. I don't think you have to or it's necessary. I never think it is. I think when we co-switch is more of a, like I said, a thing for ourselves. But um a lot of the time I think what information and just knowledge of whatever it is you're going into can force you to not co-switch. Because you could go into like, say, I'll use like things where or even in the Navy, there's times where it's like you think you have to co-switch, and I'm like, motherfuckers would tell me something, I'm like, I'm not, hell no, I'm not switching this up. Like, fuck this. And like, it's just because I know what the fuck I'm talking about. Yeah. So if like you come at me and tell me, oh, you're doing this, and it's like, I'm not doing that. Like, I'm absolutely not doing that. And they're like, who the fuck you talking to? It's like, if I do this, this happens, this happens, this happens. You can have somebody else do it, or let me do it, how the fuck I'm gonna do it. And I feel like I go up to Nipsey all the time. There's a point where he's like, I don't change how the fuck I talk to these people. It's just I know certain things I'm gonna say that you can see that they go, oh shit, we thought we were just dealing with another dumb nigga, but he knows exactly what he's talking about. And then they switch and go, oh shit, let me shut the fuck up. You talk how you want to talk, let's talk.

unknown 48:36

Right.

SPEAKER_04 48:36

So it's like uh I agree, I agree. It's a wisdom and knowledge right there. Yeah, exactly. It's like, but to that point, it's just like he don't switch it up.

SPEAKER_02 48:45

Yeah, and it's a confidence thing too. Like, so it's one of those, like, that's what I'm saying, it's for self, because it's more comfortable for yourself to do that in those moments. But as you get more knowledge and more education and whatever it is you're in, you're more prone to just not switch anything. You know what I mean? Because you know whoever the fuck is on the other end. Yeah, you can't tell me nothing.

SPEAKER_04 49:07

Yeah, you can't tell me nothing.

SPEAKER_02 49:08

Like, I know exactly what the fuck I'm talking

Closing Thoughts And Listener Support

SPEAKER_02 49:10

about.

SPEAKER_04 49:10

And that is a wonderful place to arrive at. So, yeah, this has been episode 243 Collective.

SPEAKER_00 49:15

Yeah, yeah.

SPEAKER_04 49:16

Like, hold on. I'm about to fuck up though. I know I can't say like, subscribe, and share.

SPEAKER_00 49:27

You just said it and comment.

SPEAKER_04 49:28

And comment, that's what it is. See, I got that.

SPEAKER_00 49:30

You got it, but you got it. You got it. We love y'all till next time.

SPEAKER_02 49:38

Wait. That's rep, you know. That's that's how you rep. So make sure, click like, subscribe, tune in. We're on the off room platform. So until next time.